EPISODE 160
On Neurotypical and Neurodivergent Relationships: A Discussion with Dr. Cindy Ariel
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Show Notes
Dr. Cindy Ariel is a psychologist specializing in neurodivergent and neurodivergent relationships, and in her discussion with Barry and Dave, she shares insights about the specific challenges and unique qualities of such relationships. Cindy emphasizes that
successful relationships require both partners to focus on mutual compatibility rather than trying to fix the other person, and how allowing both partners to be authentic
can deepen connection and understanding. Given that relationships are a huge part of Dave’s work, he actively contributes his perspective to the discussion with Cindy.
Featuring
Dr. Cindy Ariel
Dr. Cindy Ariel has practiced as a psychologist for over 20 years. Starting out working nightshift on a crisis hotline, she earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology and worked with developmentally delayed children and adults in both outpatient community mental health and private in-patient facilities. Cindy received her Master of Science degree from the Graduate School at Hahnemann Medical College (now Drexel) and earned her doctorate from Temple University in 1992. She became co-founder and CEO of an independent psychology practice in center city Philadelphia. Cindy is co-editor of the book, Voices from the Spectrum (2006), and also author of Loving Someone with Asperger’s Syndrome: Understanding and Connecting with your Partner (2012), a self-help book for partners of someone on the autism spectrum. Her new book about to be published is Autism and the Two of Us (Guilford Press).
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…and Continue the Discussion
Do you have a book or podcast club? If so, you may use this discussion guide to facilitate a conversation about this episode.
1) Cindy’s practice focuses on helping NT and ND persons who are in a relationship understand each other better so that their relationship grows in ways they didn’t think was possible. Why does she feel this is needed?
2) Why is viewing relationships through a neurodiversity lens especially important for successful NT/ND relationships? What differences may be observed in patterns of communication, sensory issues, the need for predictability and emotional expression?
3) What are some of the “active ingredients” that Cindy mentions that are needed to help relationships “work” over time? How are these similar or different than those necessary for persons of the same “neurotype”? Do you have personal experiences with challenges or benefits of NT/ND relationships?
HOSTED BY
Barry Prizant, Ph.D., CCC-SLP
Dr. Barry Prizant is a speech-language pathologist with more than 50 years experience as a researcher and international consultant for autistic and neurodivergent individuals and their families. He is an Adjunct Professor of Communicative Disorders at the University of Rhode Island and Director, Childhood Communication Services (a private practice). Previously, he served as Associate Professor in the Department of Psychiatry in the Brown University School of Medicine, and held a tenured professor appointment at Emerson College. Publications include 5 books, most notably Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism (2015; 2022) and The SCERTS Model manuals, an educational approach implemented in more than a dozen countries. He has published 150 scholarly chapters and articles and serves on numerous professional advisory boards for journals and professional organizations. Barry has presented more than 1000 seminars and keynote addresses internationally, including two invited presentations at the United Nations for World Autism Awareness Day. His career contributions have been recognized with honors from Brown and Princeton Universities, the Autism Society of America and the American Speech-Language-Hearing Association.
Visit Barry’s website here
Uniquely Human, the book (Updated and Expanded edition!)
Dave Finch
Dave Finch is the author of the New York Times bestselling memoir, The Journal of Best Practices: A Memoir of Marriage, Asperger Syndrome, and One Man’s Quest to Be a Better Husband. As a writer and creative consultant, his work has appeared on ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, NPR, SiriusXM, The New York Times, Rolling Stone, The Howard Stern Show, and the award-winning Netflix series, Atypical. Based in Denver, Dave’s company, Elevated Studio, produces this podcast and other recognized series.
Visit Dave’s website here
“I have read a million and one books on Autism. Uniquely Human is the best book I have ever read, hands down. Thank you Barry for this incredible gift!!!!”
– Navah Paskovitz, Mother of three boys with Autism, Co-Founder, the Ed Asner Family Center
“Compassion, learning and supportive strategies–the three essentials for working with folks with ASD–are an integral part of this must-read book.”
– Michelle Garcia Winner, Speech Language Pathologist and Founder of Social Thinking
“Thanks be to Barry for the first-ever must read written for parents, educators, and clinicians.”
– Michael John Carley, Founder, GRASP; Author of Asperger’s From the Inside-Out
“What makes the book compelling is how funny Mr. Finch is about himself. He’s great company.”
– Susannah Meadows, The New York Times
“In this hilarious memoir (which also gives some of the finest explications of Asperger’s out there), Finch approaches trying to be a better husband and father with the determination of Sherman marching on Atlanta.”
– Judith Newman, People (4/4 stars)
“Talk about being on a roll. This dude wrote a book, he has Asperger’s syndrome. He cured himself by listening to me on the radio!”
– Howard Stern